StoryTitle("caps", "Father William") ?>
William" a parody by Lewis Carroll (1833-), is even more clever than
the original. Harmless fun brightens the world. It takes a real genius to create
wit that carries no sting.
PoemStart() ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "\"You are old, Father William,\" the young man said,", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "\"And your hair has become very white;", "") ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "And yet you incessantly stand on your head—", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "Do you think, at your age, it is right?\"", "") ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "\"In my youth,\" Father William replied to his son,", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "\"I feared it might injure the brain;", "") ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "But now that I'm perfectly sure I have none,", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "Why, I do it again and again.\"", "") ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "\"You are old,\" said the youth, \"as I mentioned before,", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "And have grown most uncommonly fat;", "") ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "Yet you turned a back-somersault in at the door—", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "Pray, what is the reason of that?\"", "") ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "\"In my youth,\" said the sage, as he shook his gray locks,", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "\"I kept all my limbs very supple", "") ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "By the use of this ointment—one shilling the box—", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "Allow me to sell you a couple.\"", "") ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "\"You are old,\" said the youth, \"and your jaws are too weak", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "For anything tougher than suet;", "") ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "Yet you finished the goose, with the bones and the beak:", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "Pray, how did you manage to do it?\"", "") ?>
PagePoem(34, "L0", "") ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "\"In my youth,\" said his father, \"I took to the law,", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "And argued each case with my wife;", "") ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "And the muscular strength which it gave to my jaw", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "Has lasted the rest of my life.\"", "") ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "\"You are old,\" said the youth; \"one would hardly suppose", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "That your eye was as steady as ever;", "") ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "Yet you balanced an eel on the end of your nose—", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "What made you so awfully clever?\"", "") ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "\"I have answered three questions, and that is enough,\"", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "Said his father, \"don't give yourself airs!", "") ?>
PoemLine("L0", "", "Do you think I can listen all day to such stuff?", "") ?>
PoemLine("L2", "", "Be off, or I'll kick you down-stairs!\"", "") ?>
PoemAttribution("100", SmallCapsText("Lewis Carroll.")) ?>
PoemAttribution("100", SmallCapsText("\"Alice in Wonderland.\"")) ?>
PoemEnd() ?>